the boy with the talent strikes again.you obviously know it isnt me.check this out.joels comic strip on speaking good english. tell me what u think!

speaking of language.i realised today that i am seriously handicapped when it comes to communicating in chinese.

jap food

max brenners desserts!

our birthday boy and the candle tt refused to go out.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAM!

sorry we kinda forgot...

birthday dinner with sam,bern and jac last night.had a good time and lot of good food.jap restaurant near republic plaza and max brenners for dessert.load up the other pictures soon.really tired.

2 weeks of work is almost up.all i can say is that it has been quite an experience so far and the politics at work is scary.if such stuff can happen at the lowest level,i cant begin to imagine what its like up at the management level.its horrible.i am kinda glad i have only 4 weeks left.

dinner with the barker boys tonight.its been 3 almost 4 yrs since i have seen justin and alan.it was a good night.

really tired.need to sleep.damn ulcers.

think of pretty things.christmas party invite done by joel.i like it a hell lot.david and i decided to exploit joel's artistic talents.haha.you will be getting yours soon.provided you are invited of course.haha.but pretty much everyone is invited.looking forward to the week when all hell breaks loose in prep for the party.haha.oh yeah

anyhow,a week has passed at work.i guess i am adjusting a bit more to work.getting a bit more comfortable with the working environment.altho i still think the working environment could be a hell lot better.i must say though that i was expecting a more all rounded experience in terms of working in a hotel.i guess working right at the bottom is the way to go.i am trying not to complain too much but my ankles are.

aussie is coming up soon.flights booked for the 19th of jan.visas got a bit of screw ups.idp just happily screwed me over.i gotta try and sort it out.ugh.

i dont know whats up but things just dont seem to be going the way i want it to.i dont know when i started losing myself to anger,frustration.

day 3 of work as a front office clerk at the hotel.standing on your feet for 8 hours at one shot with a 45 mins lunch break in between is not funny.honestly,there is much left to be desired in terms of service and professionalism from the staff.i guess every workplace has its culture,although i am off the opinion that this hotel has so much more to offer.

day 3 and i am tired.every lunch break seems like an amazing race to make sure i make it back in time and not get scolded.starting to make my mistakes checking guests in.they senior staff are rather patient but i'd rather not test their patience.

i was told today that this hotel sector is very demanding and i realised that when i go into it full time,it is going to take a lot of sacrifices.i started to wonder if i chose this line because i thought it was glitz and glamour of mingling with guests and working in a nice place.but everything is an appearance.as with any other profession.we all think being a model,fashion designer or even being a lawyer is glamourous.it earns us big bucks.but everything before our innocent,naive eyes is all an appearance.beneath the surface is hard work,sweat and blood.and as david said,nothing is ever easy,but its the interest in it that makes it easier to bear.

day 3.blood,sweat,tears.and more to come.

didnt realise i had some comments on my earlier posts.

Juliet!how did you manage to find the blog?glad the pictures made you happy.come back for christmas!haha.

to this person who is just known as 'simple living' ,i did buy the dvd set in the end.it was actually much easier than downloading.dont like to be a pirate anyway.haha.

the things you learn from miss rebecca ye...

panopticism.it was greek to me when i saw the words and i reeled in horror and cowered in fear when i saw the 20page essay that she had written.but i soldiered on.haha.

so in a nutshell,heres what i learnt:
panopticism:whereby social discipline is enforced by certain social rules and norms,that we who make up society have to abide by.these social rules and norms are not physically enforced on ourselves by external powers,but we follow them for fear of judgement and ramifications should we stray from these norms.

i feel a bit smarter than usual now.haha.

today felt like a rather horrid day.i just spent the whole day feeling so empty.probably the essence of fresh out of the army with nothing to do.not for long though.

with work coming up,and my leaving for studies really soon,its starting to make me think a lot,worry a lot and all the "what ifs" are popping up all over the place.i really wanna catch up with everyone again and i know that the time before i leave is gonna fly right past.right now,i honestly feel lost and with so many things uncertain.just waiting for monday to come and probably things will be clearer.

So,I am starting work next Monday at the front desk of a hotel.Its not a major hotel which looks very glamorous but I think it would be good enough for me to start off.I just hope that I would be able to catch up with everyone despite work during this time.Looking forward to it although I must say that I can see myself whining about work once I am well into it.

22 months is not a long time.neither is it a short time.from day 1,i looked forward to today,where i would be officially released from full time service.i yearned for that day so much till my head often felt like it was going to burst from all the wishing and hoping.

The 22 months have been draining,exciting,full of ups and downs and full of tears and heartache.i have made myself miserable,my parents worry.i have in the process grown somewhat bitter and resentful.

22 months of wearing green has been an experience i would never forget.despite having so many struggles,i have come out a much stronger person.i have learnt and seen many things.i have seen for myself,who are the people who would stick by you,i have made wonderful friends in sam and bernie,i have seen that i can do whatever i put my mind to.i believe that i have come out more resilient more independent.

needless to say,the whole process has changed me as a person.although i somehow cant help but feel that somewhere along the way,i lost myself and i cant help but feel sorry for the loss of who i used to be.either that,or i have grown and see things from a different perspective.

Having said that,i dont regret the 22 months.i dont wish that none of it happened and i dont wish that it would have turned out another way.i believe that it was something that i had to go through and i cannot be anymore satisfied with the way things have worked out for me.

At the end of all this,i only have this to say.ever so often,we are blinded by what we want and what we desire and in the middle of a storm,the only thing we can ever see are the raindrops and the lightning bolts before us.we just have to sit through the storm.of course,everything i say now is in retrospect.but having the bravery,courage and resilience is something that only we can unlock from within us.

and after all this,i can only hope that i am prepared for what is to come and that somehow,i would be able to get back the joy that was in me,to erase the bitterness and resentment.the close of one chapter, the start of something better.

Its been a good weekend.Sat out with Sam and bernie shopping.Finally got what I was looking for.Went down to sungei road.Its something like a flea market selling the most random things from gramaphones to army helmets,handphones,old cameras right down to porn.

Dinner with the group from school.Went down to Vibe restaurant at Meritus Negara.It was a rather good buffet spread.had my fair share of oysters and fresh seafood.Churrasca was damn good and the chocolate fondue with very sweet strawberries.had a good time having dinner with them and later coffee at starbucks, where Jason poh was being blatantly checked out by this guy seated at a table behind us.it was hilarious.

Been feeling like a brat having lousy days.everyone says dont need to get so mad.and that gets me even more irritated.because the one thing i hate is when people cant take me seriously and think that i am one big joke.i hate it when others think i am making noise for the sake of it.and i especially hate it when i get taken for granted.